Whether you are waiting to hear back after a job interview, a first date or a medical test, the time in between can be the hardest part. The mind tends to fill silence with worst-case stories. You cannot make the answer come faster, but you can make the wait easier on yourself. Here are five ways to do that.
1. Agree on a follow-up date
Before a meeting ends, ask when you can expect to hear back. A date gives the wait a shape. If the date passes, one polite follow-up message is reasonable. After that, let it rest.
2. Fill your time on purpose
Waiting feels longest when you do nothing but wait. Plan your days with things that hold your attention: exercise, a project, time with people you like. Whatever the answer turns out to be, you will have spent the time well.
3. Notice the stories your mind tells
Anxious thoughts often arrive sounding like facts: “They would have called by now if they wanted me.” Ask yourself what you actually know and what you are guessing. Most of the time you are guessing. Naming a thought as a guess takes some of its weight away.
4. Remember that delays are ordinary
A late answer usually says more about the other person’s week than about you. Think of the times you were slow to reply because life got in the way. The same thing happens on the other end.
5. Plan for either answer
Preparing for a “no” is different from expecting one. Decide what your next step would be if things do not go your way. Having a plan makes the outcome feel less like a verdict on your worth and more like one event among many.
If waiting regularly leaves you unable to sleep, eat or concentrate, that may be anxiety worth talking about with a counselor.